Rick's Tavern vs. Father's Office

I didn't have my first hamburger until I was 17, partly because the Hamburglar scared me and primarily because I HATE CONDIMENTS. And the main reason why people like hamburgers is because they are smeared in ketchup or mustard or (dry heave) mayonaise or "special sauce". I don't care for any of the above so I steered clear of hamburgers altogether. After a couple choice encounters with In N Out --tomatoes, lettuce and grilled onions ONLY-- I've acquired a taste for them.

On the Westside I know of two places that are famous for their hamburgers. One being Rick's Tavern on Main Street, the other Father's Office on Montana. Even though its probably not fair to compare the two because they are so different, I am going to face them off against eachother anyway. Because that's life.

FATHER'S OFFICE: The heavyweight
Upscale, trendy bar with a bazillion beers on tap.
Specialty: Mouthwatering gourmet burgers smothered in bleu cheese and carmelized onions.
Pros: The burgers are really great, the atmosphere is fun if you like interracting with strangers (i.e. you are the type of person who doesn't mind talking to the people next to you in line at the supermarket) They have a ton of old Trivial Pursuit questions cards from the 70's that help kill time. The bartenders are very helpful and attentive.
Cons: Finding a table during peak hours is tough. I suggest going on a weekday before 7 or after 10. The prices are painfully high. A burger, drink and fries (which have to be purchased separately) will run you about $15-$20 depending on what you drink.
The Pros about the Cons: The crowded atmosphere can be a lot of fun. Snagging a table is easiest when you make friends with someone who is getting ready to go. For those of us which social anxiety issues, Father's Office is a good place to practice that assertiveness everyone keeps talking about.

I know, it's tiny.

Rick's Tavern: The Underdog
Dive bar with sticky floors, tv screens and old men.
Specialty: Enormous burgers that are half off on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
Pros: The 1/2 off special (comes out to be about $4.50) can not be beat. The burger is about the size of a ten year old's face and it comes with CRISS CUT FRIES. All of the hamburger accessories, including the condiments, are served on the side. They even have A1 sauce, which is one of the few condiments I actually like.
Cons: The place is pretty janky. Not exactly a great date place unless your date is an awesome person that can look past the disgusting sports bar paraphanalia and cheap old man cologne. Parking is kind of a bitch, but the biggest bitches around are the waitresses. Yeah, they are tired and underpaid and sexually harassed but can I please have an order of courtesy, hold the sarcasm.
Pros about the Cons: The atmosphere really puts you at ease to eat your burger comfortably. Its a big burger so its hard not make a mess.


Who says you can't find love in a sports bar?

The name's of these two places ALONE give you an idea of what to expect. F.O. is the kind of place your Father would go after leaving the Office. That is, of course, assuming your father is a 20 something year old yuppie struggling to hide the remnants of his frat guy past. Rick's Tavern isn't OG pirate enough to deserve its surname but it could definitely satisfy a pirates hunger.



--Just for the record I like F.O. more but I'll probably go to R.T. more often in my lifetime.




-Joanne


Rick's Tavern --> 2907 Main Street Santa Monica, Ca 90405
(310) 392-2772

Father's Office --> 1018 Montana Ave Santa Monica, Ca 90403
(310) 393-2337